Wednesday, March 07, 2007

"Sir, why is your laptop bag ticking?"**

Nicole and I are flying to Portland on Saturday morning, and we want to make sure that we aren't bringing anything on board that we aren't supposed to. This would be in contrast to my one-way flight to Carthage six months ago—September 11, no less—where I unknowingly left my Leatherman pocket knife at the bottom of my laptop bag. (I then had to mail it to myself from the airport.) So I decided to go to the Transportation Security Administration website to get the latest information on allowed and banned items.

I found out that yes, we can now carry liquids, gels and/or aerosols on board with us, if they're in 3-ounce or smaller bottles and all packed together in a quart-size Ziploc bag, blah blah blah, because we're just going to check it all anyway.

I also found out that officially, according to an actual chart on the web page, that—who knew?— the following items are not allowed on board, even in a checked bag:
  • Blasting Caps—Are those like Pop Rocks?
  • Dynamite—But they'll allow Vegemite and Marmite???
  • Fireworks—If it was July 4th I'd be more upset
  • Flares (in any form)Flair, however, is highly encouraged
  • Hand Grenades—Aww, shucks, there goes my fun Easter egg idea
  • Plastic Explosives—I prefer real bacon
  • Realistic Replicas of Explosives—What about pictures of replicas?
  • Chlorine for Pools and Spas—The plane doesn't have a pool? Darn
  • Compressed Gas Cylinders—Cones and spheres are perfectly fine
  • Liquid Bleach—So much for doing laundry on board
  • Spillable BatteriesShaped like a Kool-Aid pitcher???
  • Tear Gas—"But the guy won't get outta the lavatory!"
**Note to any government agencies monitoring this blog: The above post is meant as a parody, or a spoof, I forget which is the correct word, but it's all in fun, we plan on fully complying with all TSA regulations, we love the United States government, God bless America, and good night.

2 Talked Back:

At March 7, 2007 at 10:32:00 PM CST, Blogger Jana Swartwood said...

Flair...ha ha! :) Nice.

 

At March 8, 2007 at 8:22:00 AM CST, Blogger Liz Walsh said...

But you need 17 pieces of flair!

(P.S. hi!)

 

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Saturday, March 03, 2007

Awesome animation - "Minilogue/hitchhikers choice"

This is one awesome animated video by YouTuber kristoferstrom. It appears to be all done with a dry erase board and a few colored markers, as well as one very active (and patient!) imagination.

More of kristoferstrom's works can be found here.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

A quick message to the peoples (from MySpace)

Date: Feb 27, 2007 6:54 PM
Subject: Lucky Lab March 10th!

Hey everyone,

In case you haven't heard yet, Nicole and I will be coming back to Portland on March 10th! And that night, we're hoping to spend some time with YOU, our friends, at the Lucky Lab Brewpub on Hawthorne & 9th (map), from 6pm until...maybe 9-ish?

I only say 9pm because
a) minors are only allowed in the establishment before 9pm (but they still can't buy beer!)
b) our flight to Portland leaves at like 9 in the morning that day, which means we'll be at the airport by 7, which is 5am Pacific...our internal clocks will be two hours ahead of yours, so 9pm is 11pm to us, plus everyone loses an hour that night due to Daylight Savings...does that make us wimps? Maybe. Whatever.
c) our good friends Aron and Yvonne Noll are generously putting us up for the week, and we don't want to start the week off by coming in really late at night. If, however, the Nolls were to show up at the Lab and be willing to stay later, then we'll be staying later, too!

The Lucky Lab has two dartboards, plus it's a non-smoking pub, which is awesome. We've reserved the room on the south side of the building, right next to the dartboards. Let me just say that word one more time: dartboards.

So again, Saturday, March 10th at 6pm, Nicole and I would love to see you at the Lucky Lab, 915 SE Hawthorne in Portland. Everyone is on their own for food and beverages, although we may have a cake or something. So if you don't want the Lab's food (http://www.luckylab.com/html/menu.html#brewpub, I recommend the Italian Grinder) or homemade root beer, maybe you could eat beforehand or afterward.

Hope to see you there!

Stan and Nicole

P.S. This gathering is more or less a replacement for the more formal reception we were supposed to have in January, but we weren't able to put that together in time. We want you to know that we don't want anyone to feel obligated to get us any gifts. All we want to do is have a good time with our friends. If you do bring a gift, that's great - we definitely wouldn't turn it down - but I just want to stress that that isn't the point of inviting you all to hang out with us. :)

3 Talked Back:

At March 2, 2007 at 11:28:00 PM CST, Blogger Katie said...

HOORAY!!! DARTS!!!! I'm sharpening my pink girlie darts right now in preparation. Erin's in too.

 

At March 3, 2007 at 4:43:00 AM CST, Blogger Aron said...

STAY AS LATE AS YOU WANT!

SIGNED,
MR.NOLL

a.k.a (me)
alias: aron

 

At March 3, 2007 at 9:20:00 AM CST, Blogger stan said...

Yay for staying up later!

 

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